Welcome to Coriolistic Anachronisms

« All right, students, pay attention here. We can now show how the horse’s existence is governed by the Mounier - Quantum - Branching - SavetheTree - Noclimbing - FateisFaith - CounterParadox - FatFree Law. I’ll now distribute little pieces of the horse for you to place under your microscope; please don’t chew on them, we have limited supplies. Just kidding, class, stop screaming.

Now let me ask you a question: What did the valiant knight want above all?
A - To return to his Queen of Heart(s) with the true nature of the world?
B - To invade the magician’s castle and turn it into an attraction park, complete with haunted donjon and torture room? or
C - To ride his horse to the end of the world and jump off with a bungee cord attached to his saddle?

Anybody? No? The answer is A. So we can assume that the horse’s main fate branch followed the same path. He carried his valiant knight back to the Queen, in who’s stables he met a beautiful female Arabian horse and retired from the knight carrying business to create a family.

However, in accordance to the branching universe theory mentioned above, we can also speculate that the horse, at the crucial moment, also ran away, leaving his knight as unmounted as a hard drive. He’d had enough with all the traveling and went drinking water at the next town’s saloon.

Another version of him decided that while the knight was seeking the true nature of the world, there was time for a little solo quest, and he went to find America, to see The Horse With No Name sang live in front of a small equestrian audience.

Yet another choice made by the horse was to walk up to the tower where the two men were talking and steal the jar for ransom. He was later arrested at the border for concealing an apricot jam jar under his saddle. He’d stolen the wrong jar.

And there was one which chose to go and sit with the magician too, from whom he learned so much he decided to start teaching himself to other horses.

All these choices were made spontaneously and created as many different universes, branching away from the mainstream of our story. But they can still interact with each other if they are close enough, and even re-merge into another. For instance, the horse that chose to steal the jar and went to prison then met the knight there, the latter having been caught exhausted at the frontier, trying to bribe a guard with an empty jar. One horse decided to ignore the knight, but another helped him plan an escape through hidden mouse tunnels and together they rode back to the Queen, actually merging back into the initial mainstream.

As you can see, there are an infinity of different parallel universes, each inhabited by the horse having made slightly different choices.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a race to run. Class dismissed. I’ll see you all tomorrow for a field lesson on galloping around obstacles on fire. Don’t forget your saddles, and bring your favorite rider. Make sure they are well fed and request that they brush you before and after the class. Help one another. Us horses must stick together. »

 Posted at 1:53 AM in Always: & ICMOL: