Welcome to Coriolistic Anachronisms

Despite being dead tired I can’t sleep so I might as well write maybe my fingers will get sleepy and drag the rest of me to bed today I learned that medicine has a name for that annoying feeling people get in their legs sometimes which isn’t really painful but bugs the hell out of them and keeps them awake for hours counting sheep they call it RLS Restless Leg Syndrom I’m having RMS Restless Mind Syndrom man it sucks I tried banging it against a wall but it sounded empty and I was afraid to break right through it the wall not the head you know how they build modern apartments a couple of layers of sheetrock and you’re in the neighbour’s flat his head would be priceless if mine the head not the wall suddenly blasted into his space and stared at him in his underwear so any way I stopped and now I am using a softer approach because I am smart and I am afraid of my neighbour but tonight I cooked I had a great recipe given to me by my mentor along with detailed instructions which I followed closely but it didn’t go as planned first I had to find the kitchen and that’s difficult because my place is messy but I remembered that it’s like night diving and if you look behind you once in a while you will find your way back and I did and there was the kitchen I took all the ingredients out of the fridge but put them back so that I could remember where the leftovers would fit once I was very stressed by the cooking and then I got the board it’s like an ironing board but without the legs and harder and I started chopping up mushrooms and I remembered how I cut my finger last week it was while cutting mushrooms because there was dried blood left on the board and I was more careful this time that knife is sharp as a knife and then I stabbed my hand with a garlic head trying to crack it open like my mentor but it was pointy and now there’s more blood on the board but I’m not worried because garlic disinfects and I sliced it and also some parsley just because and I mixed the eggs too but not too much this was not an hamlet it was scrambled eggs so no frothing and by then the pan was hot so I started with the mushrooms and the garlic slowly with butter I love butter I wonder if there is a club and when the garlic was getting cooked I poured the egg mix and the greens and that’s when it all became tricky because the last time I had made an hamlet but involuntarily so I had to reduce the heat on the stove but then nothing was happening and major wobbling continued so I increased the heat and still nothing and then more heat and it started happening and then it happened too fast and the bottom stuck to the pan and the wobbling was gone and I had to rescue the meal and put it on two toasts because that’s the only bread I had and it was 2 weeks old but without green stuff growing on it so I ate it with my eggs on top but more like a broken hamlet that tasted good but looked like shit.

 Posted at 12:19 AM in ICMOL: