Talking and Walking is a Way of LifeCommercial advertisement
Is your phone staying quiet for too long? Are you embarrassed to be walking alone on crowded streets with nothing to do or say to anyone? Are your thoughts overwhelming? Do you feel alienated among the 50 billion souls you share our planet with? Would you rather have someone familiar to talk to, 24 hrs a day?
Introducing the latest generation of Motoronokiai Smart Phones, the Walker Talker. Available in 69 different colors including the new Transparent Dream, Jungle Safari, Blood Alley, Dripping Make-Up and Meatballs Spaghetti designs, the Walker Talker will instantly become your best friend. And that’s exactly what it’s designed to do!
Flip it open with a twist of the wrist, a move developed in the late twentieth century by Captain James T. Kirk, and your Smart Phone comes to life. As long as it’s open, the phone will emit the standard FCC "call in progress" glow, making it virtually impossible for passersby to tell if you are in an actual call or not. And that’s the beauty of the Talker, ladies: our new model comes loaded with the latest in artificial intelligence. Talk to it, and it will reply! That’s right: you no longer need to depend on incoming calls to look cool.
The Talker’s voice recognition software analyzes your conversation and the A.I. actually speaks back to you. Content is of no importance; whether you are superficial or very superficial, the Walker Talker will keep you talking to yourself by simply returning questions and simple acknowledgments. Gone are the days of inventing a conversation with an invisible interlocutor. People will think you are immersed in a real conversation and envy and respect you.
An optional module allows you to activate the Live Clues function of the A.I. making it give you hints of what faces to make to keep the conversation alive and credible. It will for instance tell you from time to time to Wave your hands wildly, Shake your head in despair, Laugh out loud, Act like you’re in control, Look thoughtful, Let tears come to your eyes, Ignore the stranger next to you and so on. (Sold separately)
What started over 75 years ago as a necessity, talking to yourself on your own cell phone to look busy and important, has now been integrated INTO your new phone for your convenience. Isn’t anybody calling? Talk to yourself while you slide on magnetic walkways or on the air-tram fast transit lines and fool the world – you might even fool yourself.Never again look like you have no friends.Get your Walker Talker today and start living with confidence.
Oh and yes, it works as a regular phone too.
[ Thanks Grabriele for the idea; you’re not so unfresh yourself ;-) ]